Bent Joints- (The Fantastic Mr. Fox)

There is another ticket that accompanies this one. I don't have it and I never will. You have it. You probably threw it away though without realizing it's significance. You alway's threw things like that away: greeting cards, notes, drawings on the inside covers on spiral bound books; everything. I never did like you for that.

Steak & Eggs

We only cook at night when our tempers are mild. Otherwise things get messy. Plates get broken. Feeling's get hurt and people get poisoned.

Baby Plates

Hello and welcome to Baby Plates. Please let me take your coat. My name is O'neil and I'll be taking care of you. Is this your first time here?

The tables at Baby Plates are designed to fit a moderately sized seven year old. The silverware is even smaller and so are the plates; they are about the size of a teacup saucer. Baby Plates cuts no corners. Everything that comes out of the kitchen doors is served in micro portions. The salmon dill in a cream sauce over a bed of arugula is no larger than a silver dollar, and the lamb shank risotto is to die for but it's the size of a snow pea.

The prices per plate averages about 325 U.S.D. Baby Plates takes all Major Credit Cards and is now taking reservations for December of 2011.

Dinosaurs in New Jersey

Without fail every last dinosaur that somehow survived the volcanoes, the meteor showers, and the ice age, would be eaten and consumed by the thriving homeless population in New Jersey. Not to say that metro areas like L.A. and Manhattan wouldn't put a dent in the remaining sum of Brontosauruses, Diloposauruses, and raptors(They wouldn't stand a chance, what with all of these bike messengers running into them, rogue taxi drivers, and irate pedestrians).

The starving, the poor, the down and out that dwell in squalor on the banks of rivers would find a way to roast them over a trash can.

The Dinos would become a rare delicacy and join other favorites like Canadian geese and grey squirrel meat on a kebab; They would become the talk of the town. These dino's, they never had a chance.